Sunday, June 2, 2013

relay for life

i made it down to aberdeen just in time for the survivor lap to start the relay, made it with only minutes to spare. my awesome brother even parked my car for me so that we could make sure that i had enough time to make it onto the track.

i walked the first half of the survivor lap with just my dad which was perfect, holding his hand while we walked and let some tears fall.

about half way around the track we were joined by our friends sharon and her husband roland. sharon has been friends with my mom since they were kids. roland has been cancer free for over 20 years, sharon has been cancer free almost 5 years, and my dad has been cancer for 6 years. they are all good mojo for me;) we were cheered on by my family, and my mom joined us for the last half of the survivor lap which was also perfect. she too has survived cancer through all me and my dad have gone through.

it is a mix of emotions to see how many survivors walk that first lap. in some ways it is comforting to see so many people that have survived and are kicking cancer's ass. in some ways it is sad to see how many people have had to fight cancer. it in some ways it makes me angry that any of us had to walk that lap at all., or that relays for life are still needed to help raise funds for cures for cancer. but like the sign says, there's no finish until we find a cure. so we walk on.
my parents had a luminary made in my honor, and it was one of the ones that helped to form the bottom of the "o" in "hope" that was formed in the stadium. the candles in the luminaries are all lit at night so that the walkers during the night are reminded of hope. i liked that my name was up there keeping them company as they walked.

i had been thinking about going to the relay all year, and honestly had mixed emotions about it. part of me thought that it would just be too overwhelming for me. part of me thought that it would put me back a few steps mentally. part of me thought that it would give me a little kick in the rear to keep on the fight.

chaser is also continuing his fight and made a big step today with a field visit home, here is the update:
+++ "I would have to search my memory bank pretty deep to remember a time that I felt nervous, anxious, excited, and thankful to have all three kids in the car at the same time...other than today! Chaser took a field trip today. It must have been a pretty humerous sight to watch Lisa and I load Chaser into the van this afternoon. It has been a few years since I have had to pick him up and put him in the car seat. As our nurse watched me load his limp, fragile body into the new car seat, Lisa crawled in from the other end, to make sure I was doing it right, and to lend a hand in straping him in. As we scooted his torsal up to make sure the straps held his chest in tight, his little head would fall forward because of his weak neck muscles. After a little positioning, we got him just right, so we headed out the parking ramp. When we got to the bottom, the nurse called Lisas cell phone, we forgot to grab the suction machine. Man, we ever going to get Chase out of this place?! So we re-entered the ramp, drove back to the forth floor, where a nurse was waiting with our little duffle bag. It seemed like it took forever, but we finally got on 35E heading south. Then it hit us. Wow! Chaser is in the car sitting next to us, looking around, breathing on his own- heading home! When we got to the neighborhood it really hit us. As we looked at all of the Captian Chase signs in peoples windows and on the mailboxes, it felt SOOO good to be home. We pulled into the driveway and we were greated by family waiting to see Chase. His good buddy Daulton was the first to pop in the van and greet him. Chase didnt have too much of a reaction, but Daultons smile never looked so big. We brought him and layed him on a blanket on the floor. The family and freinds that stopped by took turns hanging out next to him for an hour or so, while I spent most of the time watching soaking up the moment. After nurse-mom lisa gave him his meds, we loaded him in his jeep stroller, threw his top gun shades on him, and walked around the block. When we made the turn around the culdesac as Jim and I were chatting, we stopped for a moment to wait for Lisa, gramma and the kids. As I looked back at my wife walking Chasers puppy Carly, she looked relaxed, happy....normal. That is when I realized, we can do this! I know we can make this work!
The last couple days Chase has continued to handle getting his formula in both his J and G tube. Storms still remain nonexistant. When I asked the Dr if was normal for the storms to just disappear, he said it was highly unusual that ever happens, and with a smile acknowledged that it was happening, and again commented that he was very happy with Chases progress. Chase continues to move forward. We have noticed he is moving his eyes much more, both side to side, and up and down. He continues to crack slight smiles for us. Today was a good trial run for whats to come. We are all looking forward to the next one. It can't come soon enough. Have a great night. God is Good!! :)"

as my friend mike said today,"go live the day" and that is exactly what we did with the rest of our weekend. camping out + sleeping in + cartoons + gymnastics + park time + lunch at "chicken robin" (malena's pick of course) + library time + swim lessons + time in our craft room + new haircut for malena + celebrating papa mike's bday and early dad's day + good food made by my mom-in-law + tons of laughs, hugs, smiles, kisses + putting pictures into our 2013 album + baseball in our backyard on a gorgeous sunday night.

go live the day, i plan to do that every single day in june and july.

i hope you plan to do the same. xoxo

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