after getting mary's news, i felt like i could start breathing and the weekend could begin.
starbucks date with my girl. two good training runs in for the 10k. distillery tour in seattle (more on that soon). family. horse races. down time at home. it was a good weekend, i don't want to let it go.
i also have a couple of updates that i wanted to share:
on beth (her latest update from today):
"As of today I am off the pain meds. I have not taken any today. And it has been a long time that I was on pain meds and I think it's healthy to be off of them for a bit leading up to my next surgery. So this is a big deal.
I spent some time today with a good friend who hadn't seen me since I was in the hospital. And she reminded me of how far I have come. Rather than focusing on the things I don't do the same since I was diagnosed, I should celebrate the things I am doing and really how far I am come. She was amazed at how much more I was doing since she last saw me and I could barely get out of my hospital bed. I am taking the stairs again, I am going out in public and I look "normal" again, I am driving. She is right and I need to focus on how far I have come in the 2 weeks since I left the hospital. It already seems like so long ago, and I was still so sick when I got home. I was in a lot of pain and a big walk for me was walking my condo hallway a few times.
State of mind is so important in this fight and in life. And I am such a worrier and I struggle with how to stop myself. So I need these people around me to remind me that things are different this year but this disease does not define me and it will not take my spirit even though I am having an awful year. As I have mentioned before my body is being attacked so it does affect my emotions as well.
I still get more tired but I am only two weeks out of the hospital and you know, that is ok I get tired. I am trying to build my strength back up. I have been really sick for 2 months. But I am still getting out there and trying to do more each day.
So I will tell you about my weekend. Friday I got downtown and met with my Nordstrom stylist, yes I have a personal shopper and she is awesome. She bought me some nice fancy Nordstrom truffles as a gift to me. Saturday my mom and I went to a nursery to get flowers for my containers on my balcony and then I went out Saturday night to see a movie and get ice cream. Yesterday we went to church and then met up with some friends in the afternoon.. And today I went downtown to run errands and had lunch with a friend.. So as I look back I made a lot of good strides over the weekend. Today I drove by myself for the first time in months. It felt both weird and was also exhilarating.
I am still touched by people's support. Over the past few days I have heard from people from my college days who I have not really been in touch with since college and I am overwhelmed by their offers of encouragement and support, wanting to know what they can do to help. I was touched by my stylist giving me truffles. I am touched by Alli's happy mail campaign and getting cards and gifts from people who don't know me.
So as I get anxious for my mom to leave and for my upcoming surgery I want to remind myself of all these good things in my life and I am being watched over.
This week brings my mom leaving on Wednesday. It will be hard to see her go, the transitions are tough on us but she needs a break and it will be good for me to try and get back some of my independence even though I want people around me. My niece and nephew will be in town and they bring me so much joy and I can't wait to see those crazy kids. I meet with both my oncologist and radiation oncologist this week. I assume my oncologist will start to talk to us more about the next phase of chemo after surgery and I know it will be tougher. Sigh.
As always, thank you so much for your love, support and prayers"
on chaser (weekend update):
"With Uncle Chad behind the wheel, Chaser comfy in his mini recliner, Ava hanging in the top bunk, Tanner in the back, and the rest of us gripping tight for the 10-15hr trek ahead of us- The RV is loaded on its way to Indianapolis for the Indy 500!! I gave Chad the challenge to drive Indy style and not take any right turns- 35mins into it, hes doing good- but it could make for a long trip....
Chaser is has had a great couple of days. He has handled the absence of Keppra excellent- and we have started the weaning process of the Gabapentin this week as well. It seems like the allergy med we put him on has really helped. With a typical night of waking up every 2hrs to suction Chaser, we haven't had to once in the last two nights! Not once! - He has really been alert lately too. Today I was lucky enough to join mom and Chaser for PT with Kathy. We did more work with the NMES. I was really amazed at how cool that is. I posted a video a couple weeks back of him moving his fingers and pushing down blocks, but after seeing it in person, the video doesn't do it justice. - I put my hand in Chasers hand and watched and felt as he actually squeezed mine back. That may not sound like a big deal, but when you have been longing for that hug that your little guy used to give you the minute you walked in the door from work, it sure felt good! I get that the machine is making the muscles contract- but the beauty of it is this:
A- the muscles can still move that way
B- Hopefully it is training his brain to relearn how to make those motions-
C-Helps keep the elasticity of the muscles
D-He didn't moan or make a face once throughout the entire session- and looked like he was really trying
After therapy we made it to Ava's party in the park , and to Tanners classroom to see his Poster project of Gods Country (North Dakota) proudly on display. Chase handled it great- there is really something different about him today. He seems sooo there. I was telling Lisa that this is the best I have seen him be -looks, and mood since the accident. Shortly after I said that, he started to make some really cool noises again, as if trying to communicate. Lisa grabbed my phone to try and record, but of course once in the spot light he failed to perform. Take my word for it, if we would have recorded it and played it backwords, Im sure it would have been -Daddy ....Walleye!! I hope you all have a great weekend- I know we will! Thank you all for your continued support and prayers- we really appreciate it!
God is Good!!"
i hope that you all had a good weekend, and i hope that your tuesday is a great one. xo
sidenotes:
+++ if you signed up for happy mail for beth 2.0, you should now have an email from me with the info. if you don't have an email, let me know as i must have goofed somehow.
+++ if you haven't signed up for happy mail for beth 2.0 and would like to, let me know anytime.
+++ if you are a wonder woman in seattle and would like to run in the 10k in september, info is here
+++ if you would like to walk/run in the shore walk this year and aren't signed up yet to be on my alli's angels team, registration info is here
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