hope

"the key to success is to focus our conscious mind on things we desire not on things we fear."

(brian tracy)

there are of course a million things i could write about tonight regarding how i am feeling and what i am thinking. but, i choose to focus on hope.

i wanted one of the last things that i did today to be to spend time with the letters that i have got from the kids with crystal and marcie's fun mail projects. i could write something from every single one of the letters, but here is just another small selection of some examples of how great all of these kids (my new friends) are.

"i hope you get better. i wish you can find a way out of skin cancer."

"i'm not much of a writer, so all i really know what to say is stay strong and know you're not alone."

"cancer can hurt your body but it can't hurt your feelings, your heart or you."

"i have started following your blog. you are just too funy and light hearted. your outlook on this situation is amazing. it gives me hope that optimism can change lives."

"i am sure you are similar to me in that even when the going gets tough, you smile to yourself and stick it out....you seem to be a very good person and i can't tell you why bad things happen to good people except that it wouldn't happen to a good person if god knew they couldn't get through it, just like i know you will."

"cancer cannot damage friendship or love. we will stand by you till you have been cured."

"i am a dreamer too. dreaming is hard because if you really want that dream to come true. but keep on fowling your dreams. i don't know your dreams but i bet there good dreams."

"ever since ms. paradis has told me about you i've become motivated with many things. one is thinking more about others which i could tell you do a lot by reading about your random act of kindness challenge. alli, you're inspirational. you've motivated me to do many things i can't even write about in this letter. it is hard for me to write this letter. i can't even believe what you're going through. because of you i want to challenge myself to do more things in life besides being a normal person and sitting at home. i hope that you will not give up but you will stay strong."

"i'm glad if your glad, i'm sad if your sad, but never lost hope. keep trying and maybe you can fight skin cancer and be happy again."

"can i just say that i think you can fight this i believe in you i know you can fight it so be brave"

"i've heard about your strong journey. life can be a rollercoaster. draw on your strength."

so tomorrow, i am going to take all of the letters i have got from the kids and will carry them into my appointment in the "be brave" bag i received today (a generous act of kindness from the owner of "oh, hello friend" that i will be filling you in on more soon).

if i carry my new bag, the kids letters, and all of the love and support of my family and friends into the appointment, the only possible outcome is to hear the word "benign". right? right. i knew we would agree on that, pretty sure that is why we get along so well;)

the appointment is at 1:30 (i have a scan at 1 to check my lung, let's hope it is looking good as well), i will do an update as soon as i can afterwards.

thanks for all of the love and support that you have given me up until this point, and for all of it that i know you are sending my way to get me through tomorrow.

anywhere i go you go.

xoxo.