be brave + a giveaway

be brave.

those are the two words that i have adopted as my motto from now on. i am going to remind myself of those two words everyday, and as many times throughout each day as needed.

+++ i bought the "be brave" stamp from elise blaha that you can see in a picture in this post.i bought that stamp before we got the results. it was hard to buy the stamp. here is a little secret. i have had a hell of a time buying things that are related to making cards. i can't get over my fear kicking in and telling me that i shouldn't buy things that i will never have a chance to use. but i bought that one (big baby step), and i am so glad that i did.  i think that it will be a great addition to cards/envelopes reminding others to be brave in their own lives as well.

+++ i have decided that i need visual inspiration around the house to remind me each day that i need to be brave. so i have ordered this print and am so excited about it. i have the perfect spot in our house to hang it that i will walk buy multiple times each day. good and constant reinforcement. in addition, i was ordering a gift for someone else from this site (i literally could have ordered almost one of everything from this site, and the quality is awesome) and i found this print. i just got it in the mail and am going to be putting it up on my bedroom wall, it will be the first thing that i see when i wake up each morning.

+++ i have adopted this song as my new musical theme song. it keeps me company many times at night when the darkness and silence bring the weight of the day collapsing all around me.

+++ i am carving out time in my daily life for the things that are the most important to me. i am going to say no to the things that i don't want to do. saying no is a hell of a lot harder for me than saying yes.

+++ i am going to do as much as i can to change my diet and focus on foods that are going to give me the best fighting chance possible. since i already have one major strike against me with my celiac disease (which is an autoimmunce disease), i need to give my immune system the best fuel it can get. i have a ton of books to go through and have an appointment on monday with a nutrionist.

+++ i will do my best to go on living my life and not letting the statistics and fear plague me. it so unbelievably hard to try and keep living your life as if everything is normal and you will live a long life (or to not even have to think about that because it is just considered a given), meanwhile the black beast weighs constantly on your thoughts telling you that it isn't going to let your story end that way. i have no doubt that i will never get rid of those thoughts entirely on any given day. but, i look forward to a time when it isn't the first thing that comes to mind in the morning, the last thing i think about at night, and constantly throughout my day. like this morning when malena was talking about babies and said to me "momma, when i am a mommy like you i will have a baby in my tummy" and i immediately teared up because my first thought was that i might not get to see her be a mom or meet my grandchildren. truth is i can't even write this now without totally crying. i think that barrett may be right when he says that we are now on a crash "tears diet." i should invest in kleenex, i have to be their biggest customer in the country at this point.

+++ i am going to keep going to the counselor on a regular basis, that time is so well spent for me. it isn't easy to talk to someone else about things that are so personal, but as i have said before, if it was easy it wouldn't have anything to do with melanoma.

+++ i am going to schedule fun things for us to do on the weekends so we have plans to look forward to (cousin michelle, thanks again so much - you all rock). i will do things with friends, and have date nights with barrett. time away from malena is really hard for me. this weekend barrett and i are planning to get out of town for a day to try and regroup a little bit. right after we made the plan, i absolutely panicked about being away from malena and wanted to cancel and stay home to be close to her. but i overrode the panick, eventually...i think i was up almost all of monday night debating it in my head. but as my counselor reminded me of yesterday, i am a mother - but i am also a wife, a friend, a daughter, an aunt, etc. and i have to keep living my life in all of those roles.

+++ i decided that i needed to change up my phone cover so that each time i looked it (which is multiple times everyday) i was reminded that i need to be brave. i could not have found a more ideal cover than this be brave one with kelly rae robert's artwork. my motto + my favorite artist, it doesn't get any better than that my friends.

+++ i am going to continue to spend quality time with my dream couch - that couch surrounds me with bravery every single time i sit on it.

since i have that new stamp, and you know that making cards makes me happy, i figured it is time for a little giveaway. you all know the drill by now. leave a comment on the blog (click over to the blog if you are reading this via email) by friday midnight (pacific time peeps) and i will use the random number wizard to select the winner. i will make 5 cards using the stamp, and will send you envelopes with postage already on them. all you will have to do is write on the card, address the envelope, and send some love out in to the world to encourage others you know to be brave. how cool is that? i know, so cool. why haven't you left your comment yet?

have a great thursday peeps. be brave, i can't be the only one, i need good company;) xo