Wednesday, February 24, 2016

the shit and the joy

today was full of both.

the kind where you hear "hi mama" accompanied by a smile when you first see her in the morning.

the kind where you get into the office, realize you left the remaining green tea you had in the car, and decide you are too tired to go back out to the parking garage to get it. yep, that kind of morning.

the kind where your strawberries in your lunch are so good that you wish that you had an entire container of them to eat.

the kind where the work day is insane and you kind of just want to want to slowly walk out of the office, call it a day, and see how far you get before some texts/calls/emails you because you didn't show up for a meeting. and how you would ignore that text/call/email because otherwise your plan wouldn't have really worked out.

the kind where your kid had a hard day at school and there are tears, and more tears, and more tears. sometimes parenting is straight up heartbreaking and leaves you hoping that you said the right thing, that you brought them the comfort they needed, and that you are doing right by them with your words. 7 years in and there are times that i am so clearly reminded that parenting her will stretch me in ways i could never have imagined and that i am learning how to do this every single day. and i will continue to learn every single day. no doubt about it. and i kind of love that.

the kind where you get a text from your friend that makes you laugh out loud and you instantly thank your lucky, lucky stars you get to walk through life with them.

the kind where someone on tv mentions the band "the cranberries" and that leads to you telling your daughter how you used to go their concerts (meg -- i know you are right there with me on this one;)), and then you are both listening to the chorus of some of their best songs.  because on a day when you are learning from her, you get to teach her about music you love. perfect trade. man i hope that she always loves to listen to music, and more importantly, that she always loves to sing along (and outloud).

the kind where you open your mailbox and see some happy mail and not just cancer bills.

the kind where you listen to podcasts and get super inspired about chasing your dreams. and maybe opening an etsy shop selling your cards. and then opening your own brick and mortar store. and then basically ruling the card business world and getting a snail mail revolution to happen. just maybe.

the kind where you have got her excited about going to your favorite resort and ice skating, and you call for reservations, and they tell you that ice skating is on a day to day basis and you won't know if you can skate until you get there. and let's be clear, having a 7 year old be super excited about something that then doesn't happen isn't really awesome for anyone (especially when cold ciders still don't really sound too good to mom).

the kind where you remember a plumbing story about your dad from when you are a kid and you can't stop laughing. can't stop. and there are tears from the laughing.

the kind where you wait all day to get outside and go for a walk while your kiddo is in an appointment and as soon as you get your shoes on, the rains starts to pound. and you are in your work clothes because you haven't gone home yet. and you don't have an umbrella. and it hasn't rained at all prior to that exact time. thank you weather fates, that was awesome (in opposite land).

the kind where you decide at 7pm that everyone is tired, it has been a little bit rough all the way around, and you all get in your pjs, curl up under your favorite blankets, eat cadbury mini eggs (jill p - i know you are hearing me on that;), and watch american idol (which reminds you yet again how excited you are for the voice to start on monday).

the kind where you have a great conversation with a woman who you work with, but don't know well, about your recovery and her dad's fight at 93 to oversome health issues, and you are reminded of how everyone carries something with them through their days that is not  visible to the eye.

the kind where you are typing this blog and see news that someone you know got clear results on their melanoma scans today. love that kind of news, it is the very best.

the kind where you are going to head for bed and feel like the day was full of shit and joy.

the kind where you feel super thankful for the day.

because it was a day.

and you got another one.

and that is everything.



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