hi all, hope your week has been going good.
i haven't wrote much this week (as you can tell). not really for any specific reason, i just haven't felt up to it i guess. i have been really tired lately and so my energy level is really low. by the time that we get malena down, and do a workout, i am pretty maxed out. hoping that trend ends soon. i miss having energy. i kind of remember what is what was like, pretty sure that i liked it, definitely know that i miss it.
my left hip has been really hurting me for about two weeks now. i sometimes almost have to limp due to the pain. i am sure that it is just sore from working out, sleeping on it, or doing something else to it without knowing it. but of course my brain constantly thinks it is a tumor and cancer is on the move - mix that with how miserably tired i have been - and my mind wanders to places it doesn't belong. i should probably drag myself to the doctor for some blood tests just to make sure that all is ok if i don't feel like i am coming out of this soon (yes mom, i promise).
last night didn't help my wandering thoughts. at about 7:30, out of nowhere i was immediately nauseaus and had to lay down. i then got the chills. i went straight to bed. it literally felt like my body had an interferon relapse and kicked in as if i had just done a shot. i haven't had one of those triggers for a long time so it really took me by surprise. didn't feel nauseas today so hopefully that doesn't happen again. ever.
am heading over to the east side of the mountains this weekend for girl time with some of my favorite ladies (we will miss you kp). fresh air. great views. good friends. laughter. reisling (you knew that was coming). more laughter. i am ready. it will go super fast as all weekends do, especially ones that require 5 hours of driving (which means i get 10 hours of catch up time with my good friend ellie - woohoo!) to get to the destination. but i have been looking forward to this trip for quite a while.
i hope that your weekend brings you lots of good things too, and i will write you on the flip side. xo.
+++ you need to read this post if you want to know what it means to dig deep and kick cancers you-know-what. also, you know it is going to be good when the last line is "And, oh yeah, fuck cancer."
+++wallace, you rock!!! i got my cinnamon bears today, and already dug into them - they were soft and chewy, a great batch:) thank you, thank you, thank you - so fun to find that fun mail in my mailbox. give greta a high five for me!
+++karen, thank you for your donation to the walk - it means a lot. give vince a big hug for me too;) xo
+++ totally identifed with this blog post, i too have boxes with cards i will forever keep from friends and family. i also loved the idea of writing my own letters for malena to open in the future. at my baby shower, each of the ladies wrote a letter to malena for her to open each year on her birthday until she is 18. we have now opened three of those letters, i have cried reading each one, and will forever keep them for her to have and cherish. notes from the women who loved her from the very beginning, doesn't get much better than that.