here we go

oh friday.

if all goes according to plan, i will get a port put in my chest tomorrow and i will start treatment again.

since some of you may (luckily) not know what a port is, i thought that i would give some information on it. if i am not educating you as i go then i am not accomplishing part of why i write in this space.

the port is a device that allows fluids or medication to be entered into my blood stream, it also allows them to draw blood as well. the port is implanted under my skin and is a small disk-shaped device with a silicone center that is self-sealing.

the port is placed in the upper chest area (hence the picture above) below the collarbone. it will be visible as a raised surface under my skin. there will be two incisions, one about 1 inch above the port and one by my collarbone. then they connect the catheter (the tubing that is attached to the port above) internally into my bloodstream near my heart.

i check in tomorrow at 9am and the procedure will start around 9:30 or so. they will sedate me (thank goodness) for the procedure and i should be in recovery by about 11am or so. depending on how i feel, i may be able to leave the recovery area around 11:30. i will then have a counseling appointment (that may be interesting depending on how loopy i am;)) and then i will check in for treatment at 1:30 and that should last about 90 minutes. apparently they are going to leave a needle in my chest after they put the port in since i have an infusion tomorrow. so that should be interesting to see how that plays out as i move from one appointment to another.

so tomorrow will be a long day for sure.

and it will be an emotional one.

getting the port in will go ok, i know that. but the process of needing to having that put in is emotionally tough. getting to start treatment again is the goal i have been working for, but the fact that i need treatment and the anxiety over what the results will be in the long run are tough to think about.

but this whole thing is tough, right?

tough is cancer's middle name.

i guess tomorrow, it will be time again, to make fighter my middle name.

here we go again.

time to pick up the gloves.

anywhere i fight, you fight.

++ reminder, tomorrow night is the "stand up to cancer" event on tv. i will be watching. i hope you will be too.