Tuesday, May 12, 2015

this will hurt a little bit



i am really tired although we all know that doesn't mean i will actually sleep tonight.

the day started out with some good laughs with kiddo, and registering her at her new school for first grade. first grade. how is that even possible? i do not know either.

but i do know that time flies, being on the eve of scan results proves that. in some ways it feels like it was just yesterday that i was writing my last pre-results blog post, feeling like hell from the contrast, and debating whether i want time to hurry up or slow way down.

when putting the iv in today, the nurse decided that she would have a better shot at success if she put it in on my wrist. damn that hurts. not that having an iv put in anywhere feels good, but for some reason, that spot on my wrist is more painful for me that in the middle of my arm. but she got it in, i winced and closed my eyes for a second, and then we moved on.

not sure it if was because the iv was in my wrist, but when they injected the contrast into my arm, i got really really really nauseas. but i took a couple of deep breaths and then it passed, but for a second, i thought i was going to have to call the attendant and tell them to get me off of the machine asap because i was going to be sick.

ellie, as she always does, knocked my post-scans snacks out of the park. i was actually pretty hungry by that point because it had been 17 hours since i had ate.

got home, crashed out hard for an hour, and then got up and went to malena's gymnastics lessons. although i felt like you-know-what, i went. because i will be damned if i am going to miss our routines due to scans.

got home after that, crashed on the couch with my favorite blanket and layed low for the rest of the night.

another scan day done. ugh.

thank you for all of the prayers, mojo, love and good thoughts -- we appreciate it so much, and it means more to me than you know to feel like i carry all of you with me when we move through these days (not to mention every other day of the year).

we will walk into the office at 9am wednesday to hear the results.

less than 12 hours from right now as i write this, we will know.

whatever it is that we end up hearing, i know that we will be supported with a ton of love for whatever may come.

thank you all for that.

anywhere i go, you go.

here we go again. xo




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