send everything you've got to beth

tuesday morning beth goes in to get her results.

send her every single piece of prayers, mojo, love and goodness that you have.

there are many things that i could say about how i feel about what is going on for beth and this appointment tomorrow. but this isn't about me. it is about beth.

so here is how she is feeling today:

Tomorrow

Tomorrow brings the news of what my future holds.   And it's hard for me to imagine.  I don't want to spend the rest of my life being sick, that thought is unimaginable.   The appointment with my oncologist is at 9:30.  Lars will be with me and my parents on the phone.

  I am still praying for immunotherapy, or a treatment that will work and minimize the side effects.  I am praying for a miracle.  That the cancer will be curable and the spots will disappear.   I don't care what it takes.    
   With everything going on after my trip to Portland I flew straight to Palm Springs to be with Lars for spring break.  I am so glad I did.  It was good to be away and together.  I also got to have dinner with a friend from college which was great.
  I know it's not helpful but I keep thinking about what I may not be able to do in the future.  can't eat this or can't travel here.  Will I be able to take that on at work.  And those thoughts are as depressing as they sound.
  I have told my boss at work but haven't told everyone else.  I figure once I know a plan I will need to share the news.  And how do I tell them again.
  I don't know what tomorrow brings.  Lars and I took the whole day off so we are talking about going up to the tulip festival after the appointment.  See some color and have a little roadtrip for the day before I see my counselor.  My anxiety is definitely building for tomorrow.  I want to stay in this bubble where I am not having to do anything.
    Thank you for your love, support and prayers.

i wish i could figure out how to automatically generate human bubble wrap to immediately put around my friends with just one wish, no matter where they are. but i haven't quite figured out how to do that yet.

but what i can do is ask all of you to send everything good you have to beth tomorrow.

raise those gloves up high for her tomorrow.

i know i will be.

thank you. xoxo