"i'm just trying to be the most courageous collection
of flaws and ghosts that you've ever seen"
(morgan nikola-wren)
friday was scan day.
it did not go too well.
like last time, i asked for an iv to be put in my arm instead of connecting to my port because the contrast moves so much faster through my port and through my body than through an iv in my arm and i have been having issues with a lot of nausea during the latest scans.
i had talked about this with the tech and he pushed the contrast in slow through my iv.
but as soon as they moved me into the machine, my body started to get warm all over (like normal) and i immediately started vomiting all over the place (not normal).
i was literally projectile vomiting all over myself and all over the machine.
they could not get out of their room (the techs are in a room while they give me the exam) with the green barf bag (that i lived with while in the hospital) fast enough. it was all over the place. i was literally soaked through my shirt and the top half of my pants. and my hair (which as a sidenote i think is starting to fall out because my pillows in the morning have been covered with my hair and more and more is coming out in the shower but no balding spots yet).
they gave me a warm blanket to cover up with and then we did a few more scans. when i am in that machine, i am not supposed to move. as soon as i started vomiting (while in the machine), clearly i moved. so we did a few more (without more contrast) in hopes they could get all of the shots they needed for the radiologist to do their review.
when they finished those, the nice tech asked me if wanted help removing the vomit from the back of my hair (i am laying down for the exam so the back of my head was soaked too). of course i did since i couldn't see for myself which was very nice of him.
i then went out to the observation room and waited while they confirmed that they got the needed scans, and then when i could, ate a little snack until i could confirm that i thought that i was not going to get sick again and they felt confident that i could leave.
all i really wanted to do at that point was head home and go to bed. i was already exhausted (as usual), was embarrassed (though not my fault vomiting in front of others is never fun), and did not feel good. but my work day was packed for the rest of the day so i did what fighters do and rallied and went to work (and changed my clothes of course).
ugh. long, long day.
we head in at 7 am on monday for bloodwork and i get the results of the scans at 8:15am, so send your mojo and vibes to us at that time. i then go in for infusion at 10am and have a psych appointment too at 9. busy morning to say the least.
thanks for all of the love and support and good thoughts.
anywhere i fight, you fight.
here we go again. xoxo