hospital stay day 5

i am going to do a short update tonight, and as you can tell (no caps) this is me writing. my super guest blogger is getting a night off while he checks in on some things at home.


today was a long day.


i did not get much sleep at all last night.


i did not feel good through the night, had vomiting in the middle of the night, and then we had tests and vitals and then the sun was coming up.


i did get out for some walks today around the hallway, trying to get the strength up that i have lost in this last month. month. down for the count for a month. that is insane but that is the reality. my ass has been kicked. it is official.


but today, we got the huge feeding tube out of my nose, and eventually got a smaller one in - seems like whenever i leave here i will be taking a feeding tube connected to me. which i was hoping would not be the case.


the removal of the tube was not fun. crying. bloody nose, some more tears. then they got the smaller one in, more tears, and it got put it in wrong. so then we had do renter it in and pull the wire out. that wiped me out.


we went off the feed for a few hours so we would see if i got my own appetite back. i did a little but am still not eating much at all. we will see what tomorrow brings.


the tube feeding starts again in about an hour and will run through the night.


we will see what all of this means for a shot to go home tomorrow.


thanks for all of the love, mojo, messages, prayers. we really appreciate it. this last month has been really hard, i am hoping that we are really close to getting on the other side of it.


i miss my life.


i still believe that this year will be full of magic, it is just hard to see it from within these walls.


happy wednesday peeps.


anywhere i fight, you fight.


and there is no doubt we are currently fighting.


xoxo


++++ sidenote: they are letterpressing more "empathy, kindness, respect" shirts that i had wrote about in the blog a few weeks back - great cause - if you are interested, click here