rest

great news today. the pet scan did not show any problems where i am having the pain on my right side. the scan did show that there are some lymph nodes in my neck area that we will need to continue to watch, but nothing that causes specific concern or actions at this point in time. we will move up my next round of scans to january (they were scheduled for february) so that we are only going three months between this pet scan and my next round to make sure those lymph nodes around my neck (and all other areas) are still looking good. that news made yesterday worth it, including the fact that i got almost zero sleep. when i am downstairs drinking juice (maybe i should have kicked it up a notch) and eating pretzels at 12:30am i know that it is going to be a long night. the mystery pain continues. next test up is an mri, that should be scheduled within the next week or so. at that point, i will have done an ultrasound, a ct scan, a pet scan, and the mri. this pain is a tricky little sucker, it likes to make me work for the answer. game on.

since i walked you through my scan yesterday, i thought that i would show you what my oncologist looks like. this is dr.tykodi, my go to guy on all things melanoma. so thankful for him and for his patience, like today when i had to have him explain something to me three different ways before i got it. i am thankful every day for him and his awesome staff.

today ended on a great note. as you can see, i got to hang out with malena. nothing better than that. we had some scooby doo fruit snacks and kicked it on the couch. loved that.

i am hopeful that i might get some sleep tonight, i have been asking the nightmares to cut me some slack all day in hopes that they will comply for atleast one night. it is tough having nightmares because i don't want to tell anyone about them, i don't want them to become their nightmares either.

i found a card right after i was diagnosed that says "if the sky falls, hold up your hands" - and i have had that card on my desk every day since. i am so tired, totally exhausted actually, of feeling like i am constantly holding up my hands. i hope that i can start to feel the sky let up a little bit so i can give my arms - as well as the arms of those that have supported me - a well deserved rest.

thanks again for all of the good thoughts, as you can tell, you all continue to scare the hell out of melanoma. i am so glad you've got my back.